Off to Separate Corners of the Country

Kelson recently had to go to Rhode Island for three weeks for some schooling, so my mom convinced me to fly up to Oregon while he was gone. I just started doing all of the online marketing for my parents' business, so it was a great chance to get a lot of work done. We were all very busy working during the vacation, but it was great fun.

 My mom is opening a custom furniture & home decor shop as part of their business, and I helped her work on some pieces to sell. Our favorite was this reimagined end table turned children's play table that we built little benches for.  Isn't it cute?!

 My parents already had a vacation planned to San Diego, so rather than flying back home, I drove with them. We had a great road trip through California. We spent the first day driving through southern Oregon, which was freezing, and spent he night in Redding. On day two, we drove through the bay area and stopped off at the Jelly Belly factory.  Awesome!

 We spent that night in Monterey. There is a possibility that we may live here while Kelson goes to grad school in a couple of years, and visiting definitely made me excited about the prospect. It was a beautiful little town.

 On day three, we headed for San Diego. Along the way, we stopped off at Solveng, a Danish town north of LA. I have lots of Danish ancestors, so visiting this place was really fun. We had some authentic Danish food for lunch, and it was delicious.

 We made the fatal mistake of driving through LA rather than around it, resulting in hours stuck in traffic. Never again! That was awful. Luckily Kelson was a good sport about having to wait at the airport for two hours until we could make it to San Diego.

 We spent the long weekend playing around San Diego with my parents. On Saturday, we went to the Birch aquarium in La Jolla. The most exciting moment was when a guy proposed to his girlfriend during the fish-feeding show.  That was fun.

 Beautiful view overlooking La Jolla cove from the aquarium.  I love my dad!

 On Monday, we went to our favorite beach on Coronado and then got some delicious homemade ice cream in Imperial Beach.  My parents also got a personal tour of Kelson's ship.

We are so grateful to my parents for everything they do for us. We love you Mom & Dad!

Miscarriages & Miracles

I have been pondering about writing this post for a long time. I wasn't sure if it was something that I wanted to open up about to everyone. My mind was changed as I read Christmas letters from all of our loved ones this Christmas season. It struck me as I read these annual updates from our friends and family that we are all quick to share the exciting and wonderful things that are happening in our lives, but we kind of tuck away the difficult parts and try to deal with those ourselves. In reality, those are the things that we should be sharing with the people who care about us so that we can help bear each other's burdens. How is anyone supposed to know that we need extra love or prayers if we hide all of our troubles? Therefore, I have decided to share a little deeper look into our lives.  The truth is that 2012 was one of the most difficult years of our lives, and we could use some extra prayers.

About a year ago, Kelson and I decided that the time was right for us to start a family. In no time, we learned that I was expecting a baby, and we were thrilled and just a little bit terrified. I was 3 weeks pregnant when I started my first real nursing job, and that was a huge challenge. Over the next two months, I was blessed to have fairly mild morning sickness.  Even though our baby wasn't due until November, I was already having a grand time looking for baby things and planning for the future. My sister sent me a gift for the baby just so that she could say that she had been the first. Our future looked so bright. The baby was coming long before Kelson was due to deploy, which made it perfect. Everything was working out.

The only trouble at that point was that my job was extremely stressful, and I felt like that was bad for the baby. I finally decided to resign from that position and look for something part-time until the baby was born. Two days after I submitted my resignation, the day before Easter, I started showing signs of threatening miscarriage. We prayed for an Easter miracle. What better day for a little life to be saved, right? I received a priesthood blessing that day, and we continued to pray for a miracle. The next day, I spent several miserable hours at the emergency room. I finally had an ultrasound, and the baby's heartbeat was beating loud & clear. It was my first time seeing the baby, and it was a miracle. The doctor told us that we had a 50/50 chance of keeping the baby.  We went home and continued to pray.

I miscarried the next afternoon after the most painful night of my life. We were heartbroken. That little baby had been so real to me, and it was just gone. My whole vision for our near future was gone with it. I was left with no baby and no job. It was a bad time.  I told very few people about our miscarriage, mostly because few people knew that I was pregnant. I had one friend who knew, and she was at my apartment with dinner within an hour of when I got home from the hospital. She will never know how much that meant to me. She had experienced a recent miscarriage herself, and it was very therapeutic to be able to share our similar trials.

Life moved on, and though the pain didn't go away it did lessen. We were anxious to get pregnant again.  Five months later, in September, I learned that I was expecting again.  Once again, we were thrilled and a little terrified, although the fear had a new quality this time. Something that was once purely hopeful was now tainted with fear that it wouldn't last.  Unlike my first pregnancy, I had 24/7 morning sickness and spent most of my time laying on the couch. Sadly, I didn't feel as connected to this baby as I had the first one. I didn't want to feel such intense love for something that could be taken away so easily. That didn't make it any easier when I started showing signs of complications in mid-October. I went to the doctor, and once again I heard a tiny heartbeat. After that, the problems seemingly disappeared, and we moved forward with home. Two weeks later, I went in for my ten week appointment by myself because Kelson was stuck at work. The moment they told me that my baby didn't have a heartbeat was one of the worst of my life. It was completely unexpected. How can life go from so wonderful to so horrible in an instant? I walked out of the clinic into a crowded hospital with tears streaming down my face, and no one even seemed to look twice at me. I felt so alone. I had to wait several days to have a D&C, all the time feeling pregnant but knowing that my baby was no longer alive. That was a terrible week.

You might ask why I titled this post "miscarriages and miracles"when I didn't get the miracles that I asked for.  The truth is that my prayers weren't answered the way I wanted, but they were answered. I have never felt more strongly that the Lord is with me and aware of my pain and my struggles. I did see miracles in my life. It was a miracle to me that I got to see both of my babies and hear their little hearts beating before they were taken away. It was a huge miracle to me that Kelson was home during both miscarriages. I don't know how I would have done it by myself. The Lord has put angels in my path every step of the way. During my second D&C, we were blessed with an amazingly kind doctor. That was a miracle to me. I have seen the Lord's tender mercies at work in my life.  I prayed one awful morning that my grandma could be my guardian angel for the day, and shortly after that my aunt sent me a blanket that belonged to grandma in the mail. She had no knowledge of my prayer. It was a miracle.

I have also come to realize that I can't make things happen on my time table; I have to put things in the Lord's hands, and everything will work out for the best. When the Lord decides the time is right for us, a baby will come to our family. In the mean time, I will move forward with faith and make the most of this time of my life.

Before I end this incredibly long post, I want to say something to all of those that have struggled with miscarriage or infertility.  There is hope. God loves you. He is there for you. Your Savior has felt your pain and can bring you the peace that you seek. Find someone to talk to about it. You don't have to go through this alone.

Last of all, I would like to ask for prayers to help us have a baby. I have faith in the power of prayer, and I know that Heavenly Father listens to us. Thank you to all of those who have known about our struggles and who have supported us in the last year. I love you all.

There's No Place Like Home For the Holidays

We traveled all over for our Christmas vacation this year. Kelson was busy with work, so I headed home a week early.  My trip started with an early morning flight to Salt Lake, where my sister, Katy, picked me up on the way home from BYU. That way I got a cheaper flight, Katy didn't have to drive alone, and we got to spend the day together.  Score!

 There are few things happier than a Cafe Rio salad and tres leches cake with your sister.                         This was definitely worth a detour into Ogden.

In our family, Christmas vacation is synonymous with inventory. Fortunately, technology has made this a much faster activity than it was when we were kids. Katy and I spent some quality time scanning items. Other activities in the first few days of our vacation included the church Christmas party, lots of board games, and a trip through the snow to Elgin to see White Christmas on stage.

 Annie got her Christmas present a little early. I made her a felt doll with a whole wardrobe of outfits and a house to carry everything in. I may have gotten out of control.

 Kelson and I wanted to visit his family in Seattle this Christmas, so it worked out great that my parents were already planning a trip to Seattle to see Elf: the Musical. I even got to see the play with them (Dad was super nice and gave me his ticket). It was great. Kelson's plans to fly up to meet us there got delayed by a day, so I had a whole day to play in Seattle with my parents and Katy. One of the fun things we did was see the gingerbread festival at the Sheraton hotel downtown. They made edible replicas of all of the Disney castles plus some other fairytales. It was so cool!

 We finally picked up Kelson and got to his sister, Jehana's house about midnight, and we had to leave by 10:00 the next morning. It was a short visit, but it was great to see Kelson's family and give the kids their Christmas presents. We love all of our family!  Our visit to Seattle was great, although the endless downpour made me question our desire to go there on our next tour. It would definitely be a hard transition from sunny San Diego.

Kelson's nieces are so cute!

 Back in Baker, we finished the preparations for Christmas, including a batch of Grandma's raisin bread. It isn't really the holidays if there is no raisin bread.

 We almost never eat in the dining room at my parents house, which makes Christmas Eve special. As dictated by tradition, we had lasagna, french bread, and Diane's beautiful layered jello salad. For dessert, Diane and Roger brought huckleberry cheesecake.  I love them!

After dinner, we all gathered around the piano for a little musical performance and caroling. This is one of my favorite parts of our Christmas tradition. This year, Kelson joined in the festivities with a harmonica performance. He just started playing a few months ago, and he is doing great! Kelson and I had a new adventure this year. We wanted to see what a midnight mass was like at the Catholic church. The church in town didn't have one, so we went to an earlier Christmas Eve service. It was very interesting. Seeing how other people do things and experiencing new things ourselves is always fun. We topped off our Christmas Eve with Mr. Kreuger's Christmas and then prepared for Santa to come.

Every Christmas before this one, we opened presents at home and then spent the rest of the day at my grandparents' house. They moved into town this year and now live next door to my parents, so we spent the whole day at home on Christmas. It was different, but we all had a wonderful day. Santa was very kind to us, but more importantly, we had our family home, and we all got to spend the day together. We ate in the dining room on Grandma's china for the second day in a row, which is an unprecedented event. After dinner, we went to see a movie, another Hindman family Christmas activity.

Dad always gets a toy for Christmas, and this year it was rockem sockem robots. I totally dominated.

Kelson and I ended the day with a walk through the deserted, snow-covered streets of town. 

It was a wonderful way to end a perfect Christmas. 

There was so much snow that we just had to go sledding. Kelson had a brilliant idea to go off of a jump.  What you can't see in the picture is that the "jump" consisted of a block retaining wall with a four-foot drop. Katy and I heard a big thud and then a lot of moaning. Smart, Kelson. Smart.

Before we flew out, Kelson and I spent a day shopping in Boise with my family, including some delicious frozen yogurt. Whoever thought of putting ottomans in a restaurant was a genius. We were sad to say goodbye, but it was good to get home too. We are very grateful that we had the chance to be able to see so much of our family this Christmas. Family is what makes the holidays wonderful, and our family is the best.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year: San Diego Style

It was our second Christmas season here in San Diego. We may not have snow here, and it may look like Spring outside, but Southern California still manages to find some Christmas Spirit. 

 One day, I received a 5-foot cardboard cylinder in the mail. (It was sealed with gorilla tape, so I know my dad was in on the project.) Inside was an advent calendar just like the one that was on our mantle the whole time I was growing up.Every day, we got to open a little box which contained a note and something special, most of which were handmade clay figurines crafted by my mom. You may think your mom is the coolest, but I'm pretty sure you are mistaken.  I have the best mom in the world.

 For the kitchen table, I created a forest of Christmas trees.  I love how they turned out!

Meet Tiny Tim, our beloved, crooked, living Christmas tree.  This is his second year with us.

 One Friday, Kelson didn't have to work, so we spent the day at Sea World.  I have never been to a theme park at Christmas time before, and it was awesome! The whole park was decked out. 

 If you have never petted a sting ray, you are missing out.  It was so cool! They love being petted and will come right up and suck on your fingers. We went back twice.

 This is where San Diego kids go for their winter fun.  They have a whole area full of manufactured snow for the kids to play in, including a tiny sledding hill.  I thought it was hilarious.

 The 4-D movie was Polar Express, and you walked out the door into a "snow storm". How often do you get snow and a palm tree in the same picture?

The park stayed open late so that you could see all the lights. We rode up in the sky tower at dusk and looked over the whole city.  Beautiful!

 One Monday night, we went to a concert at the temple grounds for FHE. The San Diego temple goes all out for Christmas, including tons of lights and two life-size Nativity scenes. What better place to celebrate the Christmas season?

 I spent the six weeks before Christmas playing Santa's elf and loving every minute of it. I created custom gifts for all of our nieces and nephews (except the babies.  I will get to them next year when they can appreciate it. Don't worry, I still love them.) I made little felt roads that you can arrange in all kinds of shapes. I did one with horses and one with race cars. I also made art cases, puzzle bags, and felt dolls. For our moms, I made temple bags. I'm not sure what to do with my time now that I am done with Christmas presents.  I guess it is time to start on next year!

Thanksgiving + Our Search for Fall

Happy Thanksgiving! We have so much to be grateful for. I love that we have a holiday specifically centered on gratitude. I hope that I can maintain that grateful feeling throughout the holiday season this year. I am truly thankful for the life that I have been blessed with. Kelson started Thanksgiving by playing the ward Turkey Bowl, and then we headed to his grandparents' house in Escondido for the rest of the day.  We had a fun day and a delicious dinner.

This year's dessert masterpiece was a toffee cheesecake covered with a layer of pumpkin pie filling. It was delicious! I got the recipe over at Our Best Bites. Definitely a keeper. Kelson made a pineapple sour cream pie, and it was great too!

 We spent some time exploring the orchard with Kelson's grandpa in the afternoon. It still fascinates me to see oranges and grapefruits growing on trees in the back yard, especially in the winter.

I love the beautiful weather here, but I recently started getting a little bit jealous of all of my friends who were gushing about their fall weather on facebook, especially our friends from New England. Kelson and I set out one Saturday to find Fall. We drove up into the mountains to Julian.

We found it! Julian had Fall colors. It made me happy. 

 Kelson and I enjoy exploring old cemeteries. Julian had a fun one, and Fall was there!

 The next weekend, we wanted to go for a hike, so we went to Cowle's Mountain, one of the most popular hiking spots in San Diego. There were hundreds of people there. Being from the mountains, I was a little confused why so many people wanted to climb up a hot, dusty hill. However, the view from the top was spectacular. You could see all of San Diego, clear out to the ocean. It was worth it.

 A couple of days ago, we decided to explore the Filipino grocery store, and we found some very interesting surprises. Some were more appetizing than others. In case you can't read the lids, Kelson is holding beef bile and pork blood. I really hope I have never unknowingly eaten beef bile in an Asian restaurant. That just sounds really unpleasant.

 We may not have Fall or a white Christmas here in San Diego, but I'm not going to complain. I can be at the beach in 20 minutes, and this is the view from my balcony every evening.
I would say I am pretty blessed.

I hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving. Now, it is time for my favorite season-Christmas!
Bring on the holiday cheer!